life's transitions

big transitions are never only just easy. they come with their difficulties as well. even if you know you are taking the right next step, and doing something you've always dreamed of, there is always a bittersweet tingle in the air. in the overwhelming preparations of it all, and in the until-we-meet-again-goodbyes to loved ones that you must endure.

you can't have your cake and eat it to. you can't be adventurous, independent and brave by taking everyone you'll miss with you. even though that does sound nice.

so here we are a few days away from our departure and our minds are overflowing with what next we must do and how we can make the last days meaningful for us and those close to us.

what a joy that a new fuemmeler/norman baby boy comes into the world at this time of transition. blessed are those first few days of life. and everyday after that.

thanks to all of you who came and shared in our celebrations before we left.

this will be our departing blog and next time we meet via online blog sites, we'll be hablando en espanol man!!!! yeah.

so in honor of that.... we (i mean matt) wrote a song,

"happy trails toooo youuu until we meet aagainn,

yoooou stay here, and drink some beer,

and we will drink the water thats clear.

we will try to run and have some fun,

so that we don't get fatttt!

and soak up lots of sun

please say hi to my favorite cat!

so don't be mad and don't get sad,

something, something, some some something."

to the tune of what ever song is in your head at the time.

i think it would go well to any gaga song, or nursery rhyme for that matter.

a photographic update

here are some recent cool pics, and a big shout out and dedication to my phenominal mama.

we hit up the state fair ferris wheel

mama's belated birthday picnic at casa rondena winery.

mama & g.ma love!

joe the balloon man did a great job for davena's parkinson's run

andi's casa in the north valley

salsera julia at the latin festival 2010!

on top of the sandia crest

a tahini little story about a place we know and love

so the other day matt and i took his sister to a belated birthday lunch at a middle eastern restaurant/grocery store here in burque called "cafe istanbul." it is one of a kind, and has the most delicious assortment of goodies. so, with that said, the following story is a fictional representation of the restaurant, because hands down it's some of the best food in town!

when we got home matt asked me, "hey what did you think about the food?".

i replied, "hum...mus. let me think about it." (hmm)

matt: "babaganooooosh!" (aaachooo)

me: "bless you! are you ok?"

matt: "nah.... i falafel!" (feel awful)

me: "yeah... i feel wierd too. i'm zaatired!" (that tired)

matt: "so, why did the quesadilla get booed off the stage... because he was too cheesy! ... isn't that lebani?" (funny)

me: "no... that's pitaful!" (pitiful)

matt: ouch. ok.... well... guess what, "olive juice." (i love you)

me: "baklavahtcha babe." (back at you)

I'll fly away, O Glory, I'll... fly away

this week, life has been a bowl full of cherries. some oh so sweet, some just too sour. i need a needle and some thread to weave a balance through the joy, and the sorrow. for where there is love, there is sorrow, but the biggest sorrow of all is not to have known love.

some words inspired by today's funeral service for a relative of a friend. another young life lost before their time.

fridays have become my babysitting day, so today after the service my little 6-month old buddy was dropped off. mom and i took him with us to the after-reception, to comfort and support the family in this time of trial. he was a bundle of joy, a baby magnet, a smile maker. everyone wanted to be his friend.

six months is not old enough to be able to talk. but the simple innocence and communication of an eye sparkling smile sometimes speaks more than words.

so it was that the afternoon was spent contimplating the duality of new life, and this "thing" we call death.

also on this day, a certain loved one remains in my mind, heart, spirit, and soul.... as i pray they may have an abundance of love, comfort, peace, strength, courage, wisdom, and determination.

sometimes we ask ourselves why, and sometimes there is no explanation. no reason. no rationale. no answer.

so we have the choice perhaps to stop asking, and instead start living, creating, believing, changing, and fighting.... for everything we know to be true... for everything it is in our power to do... and for our own personal happiness.

as Elizabeth Gilbert in eat, pray, love shared with me: "happiness is the consequence of personal effort. you fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. you have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings. and once you have achieved a state of happiness, you must never become lax about maintaining it, you must make a mighty effort to keep swimming upward into that happiness forever, to stay afloat on top of it."

i think so.

the final meaningful event of this week that i would like to mention, is how one of my dearest friends moved away from the land of enchantment and onto her next adventure. what a beautiful soul that girl has, i will miss her dearly. and yet even through the departure tears, it is a time of beauty, of change, of beginnings, of yet another happiness to be discovered.

"Just a few more weary days and then,

I'll fly away.

To a land where joy shall never end,

I'll fly away.

I'll fly away, O Glory,

I'll fly away.

When I die, Hallelujah, bye and bye,

I'll fly away."